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Danna's Space
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- How much weight do you want to lose?
- 150#
- How long have you tried to lose it?
- Since I was little. I haven't been a normal size since I was 7 or 8.
- About Me:
- I have been a big girl since I was 9 years old. I have been sad and depressed about what this fat has taken from my life....I'm sick of it! I am a food addict and I admit it, but that is not why I gained so young...it's just been an issue since maybe college...so it's really the cause of how big I am now. I've tried all sorts of things to lose weigt my whole life. (The smell of cabbage soup, by the way, still makes me gag!) I have given up, I think. I got Julia's program the one you do in weeks. And I got depressed, because I could not get past the first step. Water. I'm so rebellious...I don't think I can handle the small steps... it may need to be bigger.
I don't have a choice now, though. I've got to make HUGE changes in my diet....my husband has just been diagnosed with diabetes....and we are not even 30 yet. I don't want my healthy sweet little boy, 4yrs., to go through what I have been through, or worse yet, get diabetes! I need help. I'm hoping that being here with support will help!
- Do you take vitamins or other supplements?
- no
- Are you willing to change some of your habits or actions?
- Don't have a choice!
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I know exactly how you feel, even though I only have to lose 80lbs.
The way I read your message here, you feel a lot of pressure and - I believe - anger or some other form of aggression. Why else would you feel rebellious about drinking water?
I have been suffering from periods of depression for eight years now, and one thing I experienced that depression is not one feeling. It is many, and some of them are blocked. One of those blocked feelings was a lot of anger: about the past, about my frustrated self, about the world which would not accept me, anything.
I tried to calm this anger by eating even more - which is NOT a good solution.
I do not want to say that you suffer from depression as I am not a doctor, but I believe that suppressing anger or frustration of some kind is one of your reasons to overeat.
In Julia's first book she included an exercise in which you should write down pros and cons. For losing weight, AND for staying overweight. I love that exercise, because there is a part in us which always keeps nagging about the effort, the time dieting takes, how boring it is, how uncomfortable, etc. And that part also deserves to be listened to, otherwise you cannot work on the right issues.
This exercise also shows something else: you have a choice, and you have to make it, because you are the only one who can make it.
Of course you can go on like before, but you know exactly where this path will lead you. Maybe diabetes, health risks, earlier death, dubious role-model for your kids when it comes to nutrition. Tiredness, feeling trapped in your body, etc.
The other path you can choose is a healthier one, and some of the consequences are: being lighter, more energy, being kinder to yourself, spending more quality time with your family because food is not constantly in the back of your mind, etc.
Take your rebellious thoughts seriously and work on them. I know exactly how you feel, I have those moments, too. I'm struggling with my weight since I was 13, I cannot imagine how it feels to be thin, I was not really attractive to boys and men in my teens and twens, and sometimes I am afraid of the changes - yes, even if they could be the best in the world. And I have periods in which I do not want to be thin because I do not want to give in to the pressure of fashion magazines and a stupid and superficial society.
On the other hand, I know how good I feel when I drink enough water, listen to myself and try to motivate me. And I'm trying to concentrate on those good feelings. I will not be able to change superficial people, but I am able to do something healthy for myself.
I would like to ask you some questions, from the bottom of my heart, and not to offend you: you say you have to get a program with big changes, small ones do not work for you? How many diets with big changes have you tried already? Have they worked for you? Why are you here then? And why is drinking water such a small step for you if you cannot stick to it 100%?
To me, some of those small steps, especially busting my biggest vice, sometimes seem larger than life to me. And I am glad I do not have to work on anything else.
Do you know how much sugar a can of soft drink contains? And how that amount, especially if you drink soft drinks very often or even instead of water, increases your diabetes risk? So again, why is drinking water a small step for you?
I already lost 40lbs with Julia's books, and only gained 20 back because I went back to my old ways. It works if you stick to it, trust me - and her, of course ;).
You really have a choice, so make it like the grown-up wonderful woman you are.
Love,
Nina